Weekend Movie Guide

"Rise of the Planet of the Apes" - James Franco, Andy Serkis, Frieda Pinto, Bryan Cox
Designed as a prequel to the Charlton Heston films of the '60s and '70s and living in a world in which Tim Burton's "Ape" vision never happened (a world I think we can all agree would be much better), "RPA" focuses on a scientist (Franco) who breeds extreme intelligence in a chimp named Caesar (Serkis). When his experiments begin to get out of hand, his program is shut down but not before Caesar liberates thousands of highly evolved apes. Mayhem ensues. It is no exaggeration to say that the fact that "RPA" is getting great reviews is the movie-related shock of 2011. I tossed aside any interest or care for this film upon seeing the first trailer and honestly assumed it would get panned. Instead, "RPA" went "certified fresh" on Rotten Tomatoes almost immediately and all of the critics I consider trustworthy have fallen in line with high praise. As a huge fan of the original "Planet of the Apes" and an equally huge hater of the most recent "Ape" film, I now find myself seriously considering a trip to the theater this weekend when I had expected to stay away.

Value: $7 I'm still not willing to declare this a smash hit in the making but if you'd asked me a week ago, I would have set the value at around $2. Also, the tag line ("Evolution Becomes Revolution") is pretty rockin'.

"The Change-Up" - Jason Bateman, Ryan Reynolds, Leslie Mann, Olivia Wilde
When two friends, one a family man (Bateman) and one a womanizing single man (Reynolds), pee in a fountain together after a night of drinking, they awake to find that they have swapped bodies. I suppose funny, raunchy things happen and then they switch back, each with a new appreciation for their lives. In a year that has been jam packed with R-rated comedies, is there really room for another one, especially one revolving around the tired concept of body switching? I love Bateman and Reynolds and I admit the trailers have done a nice job of making you think "Change Up" will be funny but unfortunately that appears to be all this thing has to offer.

Value: $1 If it shows up on HBO in a few months I might check it out. Otherwise, I'm totally out and you should be, too.

"The Whistleblower" - Rachel Weisz, Monica Bellucci, Vanessa Redgrave (limited)
Based on a true story, "Whistleblower" follows an American cop (Weisz) who takes a job in Bosnia and ends up discovering a UN cover-up of rampant sex trafficking. This is the first feature film for director Larysa Kondracki and has gotten some award attention in a decidedly award caliber-free year. Weisz is also drawing award consideration. I caught a few minutes of "The Constant Gardener" on TV today and was hit with what an excellent actress Weisz really is. I don't know why I forget that at times but I do. Regardless, "Whistleblower" could be a major player later this year.

Value: $5 This really isn't the type of film most of us want to see this time of year but when it's on DVD in a few months, it could definitely be worth a look.

"Bellflower" - Evan Glodell, Tyler Dawson, Jessie Wiseman (limited)
Two friends (Glodell and Dawson) have their plans of preparing for the coming apocalypse (by developing WMDs) thrown off by the introduction of a woman (Wiseman) into their lives. This is quite the concept film. I've no idea what to make of "Bellflower" to be honest but wow, it is getting some outstanding reviews. Consider me slightly intrigued.

Value: $3 With a little more buzz I could be convinced to rent this but as it is, I'd give this a shot on Netflix Instant.

Movie News Today

Next Movie asks, "why is Jason Bateman underrated"? Probably because he keeps appearing in movies like "The Change Up." Kidding, of course, I love Bateman.

If you've been looking for the Millennium Falcon, it's probably at the bottom of the Baltic Sea.

Ruth over at Flix Chatter lists her 10 favorite seasoned actors. Check it out!

Care to see the new Superman (Henry Caville) in costume? Follow the link.

A new, longer trailer for "Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy" aka "The Film That Will Win Gary Oldman An Oscar" dropped today. Cannot wait!

Blu Ray Review - "Unknown"

Shortly after Dr. Martin Harris (Liam Neeson) and his wife Elizabeth (January Jones) arrive in Berlin, Martin realizes his briefcase was left at the airport. During the cab ride to retrieve it, his taxi is involved in an accident that leaves him in a coma. When he wakes up three days later, he finds that his wife doesn't know who he is and he had been replaced by another man (Aidan Quinn) claiming to be him. He begins to think he's gone mad until he is nearly captured and killed. With the assistance of the taxi driver Gina (Diane Kruger), he begins to piece his memory back together and tugging at a thread of a vast conspiracy.

"Unknown" has been unfairly branded as "Taken 2" when in reality the two are hardly similar beyond their star and European setting. Don't get me wrong, I quite like "Taken." I consider it to be one of the more enjoyable film experiences of 2009, a guilty pleasure if you will. But I have to be honest, it's an absurd movie. Actually, "absurd" might be putting it lightly. "Taken" is like "24" on steroids and that is saying something because as much as I love Jack Bauer (favorite TV character from an hour long drama/action ever), he is nothing if not absurd.

"Unknown", on the other hand, is a much more reasonable action-thriller, comparatively speaking. The film does an excellent job of keeping you guessing and refusing to allow you to get comfortable with one idea or another. You know Harris isn't insane because the film opens with him and his wife together but you start to wonder if perhaps he created all of that in his mind. When it becomes apparent that he really isn't nuts, you start working to piece together how anyone could pull a conspiracy of this magnitude off such a short period of time. And when the gears of the final twists and turns begin to whirl into motion, you're not sure exactly what's going to happen but you know it's going to be big. Throughout all of this, Harris serves as the voice of the audience. He wonders aloud throughout his searching and asks the questions that I myself was asking while sitting in my easy chair. As confused as we might be watching the mess unfold, it's no more confused than Harris is himself and it is this element that allows it to truly excel.

The actors that surround Neeson all range from marginally mediocre to half way decent and that at times can create an issue or two. In particular, Jones comes off as hollow and one note, just like everything else she's ever been in. But "Unknown" starts and ends with Neeson which is a pretty darn good bedrock on which to build a film's foundation. He's always been an excellent actor but in the last few years it seems that he's figured out how to make himself more approachable and therefore more enjoyable to watch. He plays characters that you root for no matter what and that's an underrated talent in Hollywood. He makes bad films pretty good and pretty good films very good. "Unknown" is the latter; the concept and subsequent twists would make a solid film regardless but Neeson sells his part wonderfully and pushes the movie to new heights.

Grade: B+

Movie News Today

Laurence Fishburne will play Daily Planet editor Perry White in 2013's "Man of Steel" film. Fishburne is a tough dude to nail down. Some of his performances are magnificent, some so bland as to induce a coma. Interesting cast Zack Snyder is putting together.

Vanity Fair provides a nice profile of the brilliant Emma Stone. Love her.

Should I See It takes a look at the less than stellar box office return of "Cowboys and Aliens."

NPR has an interview with Steve Carell that's worth a read.

I saw a teaser trailer for the new concept/sci-fi flick "In Time" this weekend and the full trailer hit yesterday. I am cautiously optimistic about this.

"Cowboys and Aliens"

The combination of the Western genre and science fiction is nothing new in Hollywood. In my mind, “Firefly” (briefly) perfected the mix in the early 2000s but it was only the descendant of “Westworld”, the original “Star Trek” series, and a host of other films and television shows that found a natural cross-pollination between the Old West and the vastness of space. I cannot, however, remember a film that so purposefully and blatantly threw the two themes together without any measure of pretense like “Cowboys and Aliens” does (at least not a mainstream film). Everything you really need to know about “Cowboys and Aliens” is right there in the title: it is two hours of cowboys fighting aliens. And on some level you have to respect director Jon Favreau and the powers that be behind this film for being so bold and open about the film’s subject matter, even if the finished product doesn’t quite live up to that boldness.

When Jake Lonergan (Daniel Craig) wakes up in the New Mexico desert, he finds a strange metal bracelet strapped to his wrist and he cannot remember who he is or where he came from. Upon his arrival in a local town, he is promptly identified and arrested as a notorious bandit who recently robbed a stagecoach carrying gold belonging to a tough rancher named Woodrow Dolarhyde (Harrison Ford). As Lonergan is about to be handed over to Dolarhyde, a group of alien spaceships roar into town firing devastating guns and snatching up hostages, including Dolarhyde’s son. Suddenly the bracelet on Lonergan’s wrist begins to makes noises and converts itself into a powerful gun with which he is able to shoot down one of the ships. Soon after he remembers that he and his woman (for lack of a better term) were also abducted at one point and so he joins in the hunt for the aliens along with Dolarhyde, Doc (Sam Rockwell), and Ella (Olivia Wilde), a mysterious outsider who seems to know a thing or two about him. What they discover forces all differences and conflicts between cowboys, outlaws, and Indians to be put aside as former adversaries must come together to defeat a common enemy.

“Cowboys and Aliens” enjoys a pedigree that most movies can only dream of. An incredible cast, a hot director, and a highly sought-after writing team including Damon Lindelof, Roberto Orci, and Alex Kurtzman. At the beginning of the year, it seemed almost impossible that this type of quality talent could turn out anything less than a spectacular action film and yet the end result excels in only a few moments and becomes stagnant in many others. It all boils down to the fact that there’s not much done with the concept as a whole. The story isn’t so much cliché as it is just a rather bland infusion of Old West and sci-fi. The aliens look the way you’d expect aliens to look, the cowboys act the way you’d expect them to act, and the arrival of the Indians just throws the whole film into a frenzy of Western generalities. There’s absolutely nothing new in “C&A” and that causes the film to bog down when it should build momentum. Lonergan and Dolarhyde move from a fight with one group of people to a fight with another group of people and there’s very little room for development beyond some mediocre flashbacks that feel more “C.S.I”-like than I’d really care for in a major motion picture. The script is neither consistently humorous nor particularly gritty or edgy which leaves the film to tread water in the middle of a fairly shallow pool of mediocrity. I would also say that the combination of the two genres is a bit rocky; Favreau builds a pretty solid base for a traditional Western in the first 15 minutes and then suddenly the aliens arrive and throw everything off. Honestly, in spite of being a huge sci-fi fan, I would have probably preferred to see Craig and Ford in a Favreau Western than I would in a rough combo film like this one is. And while most of the actors hold their own, Wilde continues to vex me. I don’t understand her or her appeal. Clearly she’s extremely attractive and I wouldn’t call her a bad actress but I am never affected by any of her performances. That’s no different here as she just embodies the blandness of the film as a whole.

That’s not to say that there isn’t a lot to like about “Cowboys and Aliens.” Craig and Ford are both excellent and perhaps even more important, as a friend of mine said, neither of their performances brings to mind their previous, more iconic roles. This isn’t James Bond and Indiana Jones riding around in the Old West and the fact that they avoid that trap is a testament to both their abilities and the ability of Favreau as a director. I might argue that this is the best Ford has been in many, many years but then you would counter with the fact that he hasn’t had a meaningful role in many, many years. Touché. Seriously, though, “C&A” serves as a reminder that Ford is still a very capable, charismatic actor who deserves better than middling rom-coms like “Morning Glory” or childhood-erasing disasters like the fourth “Indiana Jones” movie. Rockwell provides solid comedic relief though considering the overall humorlessness of the film he almost seems out of place. The action sequences are all very good and the infusion of CGI and special effects is seamless (even if the aliens themselves are somewhat lackluster). And it is, if nothing else, wholly entertaining, the base component of any summer blockbuster.

“Cowboys and Aliens” has some value and certainly provided me with an enjoyable afternoon in the middle of a busy work week. I would also hold out hope that it could lead to some better roles for Ford and a rejuvenation of his magnificent career. Yet it seems to be simply uninspired and that takes away from the immense fun I expected to get from a film as boldly titled as “Cowboys and Aliens.”

Grade: B-

I’ve found that "B-" films are the hardest to write about,
Brian

For a deeper look at the "could have been better as a Western" thought I expressed above, check out the coverage by Anomalous Material.

DVD Roundup

Rio (2011) - Jesse Eisenberg, Anne Hathaway, George Lopez
A domesticated macaw (Eisenberg) goes on a wild Brazilian adventure with a free spirited coed (Hathaway) in the search for his longtime owner. I like animated films in general but something about "Rio" just kind of bugged me, though I can't really put my thumb on the problem. Most of the reviews were either mildly positive or moderately negative and perhaps that's the biggest issue: there's no passion one way or the other for this film. It just seems to exist and that's the exact feeling I got from the trailers.

In Home Viewing Recommendation: Probably worth a rental if you have little ones but I personally won't take a shot on "Rio" until it pops up on HBO (if then).

Soul Surfer (2011) - AnnaSophia Robb, Dennis Quaid, Helen Hunt
The real-life tale of a young and talented surfer (Robb) who lost her arm in a shark attack and has worked to overcome her disability. This really is a great and inspiring story but unfortunately, "great and inspiring stories" often make for "cliche and painful" movies. The Christian overtones of "Soul Surfer" helped it bank a respectable amount of money ($43 million) in theaters but most reviews I read pegged it as fairly poorly acted with a mediocre narrative.

IHVR: If you can look past the over-acting, "Soul Surfer" probably holds some value as an uplifting film about perseverance. I, however, cannot look past over-acting so...

Exporting Raymond (2010) - Phil Rosenthal
This documentary follows Rosenthal, the man behind "Everybody Loves Raymond", as he attempts to help Russian television executives create a great Russian sitcom. I've got a friend who saw this and raves about it at every opportunity. I'm a big fan of documentaries and completely fascinated by the subject matter.

IHRV: I'll be hoping it pops up on Netflix Instant soon but if not, I plan to seek it out. Definitely worth a rental.

Blu Ray Pick of the Week

Sleepers (1995) - Brad Pitt, Robert De Niro, Dustin Hoffman
When two gangsters murder a lifelong prison guard in seemingly cold blood, the case opens up a horrific back story concerning the treatment the gunmen (and their friends) received while incarcerated in a juvenile facility. "Sleepers" is not a perfect film and it requires a bit of suspended reality to make it through. It is, nonetheless, a brilliantly acted and directed film, though incredibly hard to watch. It is, in my mind, a great film that has been overlooked.

IHVR: If you are capable of sitting through some extremely tough scenes, "Sleepers" is absolutely worth your time.

New to Blu
Conan the Barbarian (1982) - Arnold Schwarzenegger, James Earl Jones, Max von Sydow
Conan the Destroyer (1984) - Arnold Schwarzenegger, Wilt Chamberlain, Grace Jones
Never seen either of the "Conan" films but you can find those who swear by them. Not particularly interested but hey, to each his own.

Fistful of Dollars (1964) - Clint Eastwood, Gian Maria Volonte, Marianne Koch

For a Few Dollars More (1965) - Clint Eastwood, Gian Maria Volonte, Lee Van Cleef

The Sergio Leon-Eastwood compilations have been available on Blu Ray in the past in a box set, but this is the first time they've been out there separately. I'm ashamed to say I've not seen either of these films. I'll have to make time now that there's a Blu Ray option.

In the Name of the Rose (1986) - Sean Connery, Christian Slater, F Murray Abraham

Also New

Eastbound and Down: Season 2 (2010) - Danny McBride, Steve Little, Katy Mixon
Stake Land (2010) - Connor Paolo, Nick Damici, Kelly McGillis

Movie News Today

Jean Claude van Damme, Chuck Norris, and (*gulp*) John Travolta have joined the cast of the "Expendables" sequel. JCVD makes a lot of sense; Norris...alright, I can get that. But Travolta? TRAVOLTA?! Curse you, Stallone. Of all the hacks in the cast of "The Expendables" Travolta is in a class all his own. The day that he was added to this "film" will be rued.

Leonardo DiCaprio is considering the lead role in "The Creed of Violence", another Western to pair with the upcoming Tarantino pic "Django Unchained." If 13 year old me knew how much 28 year old me genuinely anticipates everything DiCaprio does, he'd be so very disappointed.

Peter Berg has confirmed that there is a script for a second "Friday Night Lights" film. I love (LOVE) the first film and I'm working through the TV series now. Sounds good to me.

As Marvel continues to push every single one of their lesser known superheroes to the big screen, it appears a Dr. Strange film is in the works. Okay then.

Matt at Cinema Slants continues his Summer of Spielberg series with a look at the director's WWII films. Check it out.

"Larry Crowne"

Recently a colleague of mine hosted an event on his blog called “The Greater Good” in which he asked readers to pick a film that they would wipe off the face of the planet in order to better the movie industry as a whole. You know the concept: if “Grease” was never made, would I have been forced to live through 28 years of a non-talent like John Travolta parading his way across my film consciousness and prompting any number of murderous thoughts within my brain? Probably not. After seeing “Larry Crowne” I’m not entirely convinced that my entry into this event shouldn’t have centered on 2002’s “My Big Fat Greek Wedding.” That was, after all, the film that launched the career of one Nia Vardalos, who is unfortunately responsible for the horrendous script that hamstrings “Larry Crowne” from the outset and attempts to drive a stake through the brain of every mild mannered audience member who happened to be stupid enough to put themselves through this mess.

Larry Crowne (Tom Hanks) is a long-time floor manager of a Wal-Mart-like superstore who happens to love his job. Due to the recession, however, his company begins downsizing redundant employees and because of Larry’s lack of a college education, he soon finds himself without a job. In order to make himself more marketable, he registers for some classes at a local community college. Here he meets a set of new friends, led by Talia (Gugu Mbatha-Raw) and Dell Gordo (Wilmer Valderrama), who share his passion for scooters and who attempt to revamp his image. He also meets Mercedes Tainot (Julia Roberts), an alcoholic speech teacher in a failing marriage and an even less fulfilling job. The two strike up an awkward friendship that ultimately benefits them both in this story of revitalization and renewal in the face of adversity.

First off, I love Tom Hanks and Julia Roberts. At one time or another, I would have listed them both as my favorite actor and actress respectively. Hanks is the classic All American Actor, the guy you root for at all times and who seems to genuinely understand his massive appeal. Roberts is the female version of Hanks, the beautiful girl next door who’s managed to remain a fan favorite for 20 years in an industry that forgets women the second they turn 35. I am always happy to see either of them on screen (unless it involves “The Da Vinci Code”) and despite the dip in productivity that each have experienced over the last decade, they can still get me out to a theater based solely on their names. I have long believed that you can’t make either of these great actors unlikable.

Well, I was wrong.

“Larry Crowne” is an absolute disaster in every sense of the word. None of these characters are in the least bit relatable or likeable. Tainot is an awful old bat that I pretty much hated the moment she stepped on screen. I’m all for a good redemption story and I understand that you have to start low to make the high more significant, but if this character had been hit by a bus in the tenth minute, I would have been fine. Larry himself is so thoroughly hapless that I just couldn’t bring myself to invest in him despite the numerous times my brain told me, “Come on dude, that’s Tom Hanks! You’ve got to love his character! It’s just a rule.” He is a painful mix of Forrest Gump (my least favorite Hanks film until now) and the kid from “Big” that comes across as wholly unbelievable. No one is this naïve. No one. The rest of the cast, which includes George Takei, Cedric the Entertainer, and Rob Riggle, ranges from totally worthless (Pam Grier) to cringe-worthy and one dimensional (Bryan Cranston, how in the name of “Breaking Bad” did you get talked into this role?!). That’s not even mentioning Mbatha-Raw who probably shouldn’t be allowed to act again. Shockingly, Valderrama gives the best performance of anyone in the film but in some ways, isn’t that all I need to say? The foreign dude from “That ‘70s Show” who has done absolutely nothing else of note in his career is the best part of this film. Ouch.

All of these retched characters are nothing, however, compared to the excessively cheery and somewhat pointless nature of the film’s narrative. There is no real humor in “Larry Crowne”, only watered-down jokes that might suffice on a middling CBS sitcom but don’t do the job in a feature film. The overt cheeriness goes hand-in-hand with Larry’s naivety but as I said before, this naivety is irritating, not endearing. Everyone is happy all the time (except for Tainot) and as a result there is no depth to the characters or the story. The events simply play out in front of the helpless audience instead of bringing them into the story. That’s not always a bad thing, I guess, but when you’re working with an extremely relevant topic like job loss, you’re wasting an opportunity to engross the audience. “Crowne” really doesn’t even make an attempt to do so and that is perhaps its most egregious offense.

In short, this film has Nia Vardalos’ fingerprints all over it. IMDB will tell you that Hanks co-wrote “Larry Crowne” with Vardalos but I don’t believe it for a minute. This mess has Vardalos’ fingerprints all over it: one note characters, a shallow plot, and abysmal dialog. That’s all Vardalos has treated us to since “Greek Wedding” scored $350 million at the box office and I was willing to accept that she would always be involved with horrible movies that I would simply stay away from. But now that she’s infected the glorious careers of both Tom Hanks and Julia Roberts…well, I think I’m ready to preserve the greater good and rid the world of “My Big Fat Greek Wedding” and everyone who had anything to do with it. Since I’m out of plutonium, however, I’ll just have to implore you, dear readers, to stay away from “Larry Crowne” and pretend you’ve never heard of Nia Vardalos.

Grade: C-

I never liked that movie in the first place,

Brian

Movie News Today

John Moore has been offered a shot at directing the fifth "Die Hard" film. This is what John McClane has come to? The guy who directed "Max Payne" could be in charge of his next chapter? Boo.

Drew Pierce, who was recently tapped to write "Iron Man 3", will also pen an adaptation of the graphic novel "The Mighty." Big year for Mr. Pierce.

Weekend Box Office Results
This week's results make me a little sick to my stomach. Really, people? "The Smurfs"? *Head shake* Also, let this be a lesson to future blockbuster filmmakers: sometimes it's not about your direct competition as far as what's getting released against your film; sometimes it's about the sheer number of quality options at the box office. "Cowboys and Aliens" didn't get great reviews but that shouldn't have stopped it from making at least $50 million in it's first weekend. A lot of people went to the movies this weekend but they spread their money around rather than focusing in on one film. If "Cowboys and Aliens" would have pushed back a single week to the first weekend in August, I would guess its haul would have been 30% higher. Bad call right there.

1. "Cowboys and Aliens" - $36.2 million
2. "Smurfs" - $36.2 million
3. "Captain America" - $24.9M ($116.77 million total)
4. "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2" - $21.93M ($318.46M)
5. "Crazy, Stupid, Love." - $19.3M
6. "Friends with Benefits" - $9.3M ($38.2M)
7. "Horrible Bosses" - $7.1M ($96.2M)
8. "Transformers: Dark of the Moon" - $5.97M ($337.89M)
9. "Zookeeper" - $4.2M ($68.73M)
10. "Cars 2" - $2.3M ($182.1M)

Movie News has been slow of late so I present you with two trailers today.
The first is for the George Lucas-produced "Red Tails", a WWII flick about the Tuskegee Airmen. Looks pretty solid.



And the second is for the star-studded "Ides of March" which is Oscar bait of the highest order. Can't wait.

Weekend Movie Guide

"Cowboys and Aliens" - Daniel Craig, Harrison Ford, Olivia Wilde
In the Old West, a group of cowboys find themselves besieged by an army of aliens. The key to their salvation lies in the hands of a mysterious stranger (Craig) who happens to have an alien weapon attached to his arm. I think "Cowboys" to be a classic case of over exposure. When the trailers started rolling out last year, I was THOROUGHLY on board but the more I see of the film, the more nervous I get. It has an outstanding pedigree with an excellent cast, a proven action director (Jon Favreau), and a killer writing team (Damon Lindelof and the rest of the "Lost" team) but you start to wonder if there's really much you can do with the premise. Early reviews have been fairly spotty and I'm really not sure what to expect at this point. Hoping (cautiously) for good things.

Value: $7 I can't, with any certainty, say this'll be worth the full price of a theatrical admission but it's impossible for me to ignore the potential of a raucous summer blockbuster like this. Plus, if nothing else, it won't look as good on your home TV as it will on screen.

"Crazy, Stupid, Love." - Steve Carell, Ryan Gosling, Julianne Moore, Emma Stone
A middle aged family man (Carell) has his world rocked when his wife (Moore) leaves him for another man (Kevin Bacon). Distraught and unsure of himself, he reenters the dating world with the help of a younger playboy (Gosling) who happens to be having his own problems with a new girl (Stone). I've been looking forward to "CSL" for a while now. I'm a big fan of dark-tinted comedies but on top of that, there are very, very few actors in this world who can bring real, genuine heart to a comedy like Steve Carell can. I was also very intrigued by the fact that apparently Carell demanded that Gosling be his co-star; such a different and original pairing. With a "fresh" rating on Rotten Tomatoes, I'm probably more excited about this than I am "Cowboys and Aliens."

Value: $10 for me, probably $7 for you I'm a pretty self-aware guy so I recognize that it's likely that I'm more interested in this film than the average person. Still, I'd be willing to bet this is worth your time.

"The Smurfs" - Neil Patrick Harris, Hank Azaria, Jayma Mays
When the Smurfs invade the life of a hip New Yorker (NPH), the 86 minute runtime turns into a Saturday morning cartoon on CGI steroids. I'm not going to say one bad word about this "film"; instead, I'd just like to present you with the collected works of director Raja Gosnell and let you make your own decisions: "Home Alone 3"; "Never Been Kissed"; "Big Momma's House"; "Scooby-Doo"; "Scooby Doo 2"; "Yours, Mine, and Ours"; "Beverly Hills Chihuahua." If you've successfully sat through more than two of those movies without attempting suicide in "Airplane" fashion, you're a better man than I.

Value: $0 If you end up seeing this, you're either high or you have kids who aren't old enough to see "Captain America." Either way, the theater should probably be forced to give you some sort of compensation for watching this mess.

"Attack the Block" - John Boyega, Jodie Whittaker, Nick Frost (limited)
A gang of British teenagers defends their housing project against a group of invading aliens. It's a big week for odd alien encounters. Brought to you by the producers of "Hot Fuzz" and "Shaun of the Dead", "Attack the Block" is absolutely tearing it up in the critical review department. It's very interesting, too, because this sucker kind of came out of nowhere; it really didn't do much in the festival circuit until South By Southwest and hit the release calendar very late (as in, last week). Personally, this looks like a blast. It'll open up in wider release in a couple of weeks and you can bet I'll be there.

Value: $10 I'm going out on a limb here given how very little I really know about this film, but it's "Certified Fresh" 92% rating is enough for me to expect big things.

"The Devil's Double - Dominic Cooper, Ludivine Sagnier (limited)
After becoming a body double for Uday Hussein, a man (Cooper) gives a voyeuristic view of the life and times (and atrocities) of Saddam Hussein. Cooper's performance has drawn some acclaim but the whole product hasn't been as well received.

Value: $2 This is the type of movie that I would add to my Netflix Instant Queue and then forget about for months.

"The Guard" - Brendan Gleeson, Don Cheadle
A black comedy that pairs a screw up beat cop (Gleeson) with a by-the-book FBI agent (Cheadle). To call this a cross between "In Bruges" and "Hot Fuzz" seems too easy but that's exactly what I've gleaned from the information I've seen. Gleeson and Cheadle are both fantastic actors who have proven comedic timing and Gleeson is getting a TON of well deserved pub for his role.

Value: $5 Whether you rent it, Netflix it, or whatever other method you have of procuring movies in your home, I would definitely take a chance on "The Guard."